I wanna give up now... Everything... I already so messed with my family.. It doesn't matter who i'm messed up with next.. I don't wanna care about anything right now... I'm just so tired of everything in my life... Why can't i just have a normal life?



-Lulu

11:40 AM;
I Lost My Way ToYOU

I'm attached.. Yes.. !st time in my life in the past 19 years.. And he is my bui bui... Kekez~! Envious? Feel happy for me? Thanks.. Kor.. When will it be your turn? Jia you!!! Happy serving NS!!

-Lulu

3:51 PM;
I Lost My Way ToYOU

You said you love me... You said you wanna confront him as soon as possible? Is this all true? What u wanna do? Or just on impulse? Do i really mean that much to you? Or just that i happen to be there when you're alone? I need an answer.. I need to know why is it me... Why you wanna do these things?

I wanna be sure that i would make the correct choice.. I'm in a dilemma.. Dunno what should be my choice... Please.. give me an answer to my questions and make me feel secured...

-Lulu

7:12 PM;
I Lost My Way ToYOU

Yes.. We've been sms-ing and talking on the phone.. Sweet sweet feeling... But is it true? Or is it just my illusion? I dunno... Is it you or is it him.. I need to think it through...

-Lulu

11:50 PM;
I Lost My Way ToYOU

Yes.. 9th September 2007 was the very first time i held your hand... Lean on your shoulders, Cried in your arms and lied on your laps.. Hahaz~! I'll remember de... The feeling of holding your hand was like so sweet... And the way we actually held it...

14th September was the first time i celebrate your birthday with you.. And also, the first time i held his hand in a special way.. First time seeing him emo... I'll remember these 2 weekends.. =)

-Lulu

6:52 PM;
I Lost My Way ToYOU

This year we cut cake and went for movie. for kor kor's birthday.. Went to watch rush hour 3.. With a bunch of guys... well.. that's not the point

Anyway.. i miss you.. Finally got to meet u.. But den we didn't talk much.. And the name u call mi is differen already.. I dunno why the change and dunno did u hear anything from anybody or not.. So i promise myself i won't tell anybody about you, feeling for you and what i'm planning.. I dun want people to spoil my plan or any hiccups..

I has my first movie with u.. And i'm so happy... The last time i met you.. We didn't have any conversation that is between us.. I mean i didn't talk to you.. When i reach home, i saw 2 pairs of shoes.. And when i reach my living room.. I heard ur voice.. I was happy.. And kinda sad.. So i went in.. And i was greeted by a crowd and u.. wearing red... Sitting the chair watching tv.. Den u turn and look at me... I dunno why.. But i realised that u had ur eyes on me from me walking from the door to the end of the room, put down my bag, u still had ur eyes o me.. Til the very minute when i acknowledge your presence, then did u turn away.. does that mean anything? I have no idea.. But i like the way u look at me... Coz it's been a veri long time since u last looked at me and for so long... I really miss you alot.. And i cherish u...

-Lulu

4:22 AM;
I Lost My Way ToYOU

I need my time for myself!
I need time for VE!
I need time for friends!
Can my family stop complaining about me not being around in the household? Can they stop saying that I always go out? Can they stop expecting things from me? Yes.. You're important to me, but I still have my own life. I don't want to miss out the good things in life. I've been with my family. We watch tv together in the middle of the night, eat dinner and supper together. What else they want? I still got homework to do, school to attend, work to do and friends to talk to. I don't wana lose my friends. You can't expect me to accompany you for 24/7 right? I don't enjoy talking to you all.. All you will say is that I HAVE TO GO TO THE UNIVERSITY! and you would say STUDY IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN WORK! I know how to deal with the importance of me things. I want OTHER TOPICS! And not topics that I don't wanna listen, Who the hell would want to communicate? I want to do things that I like, that i want to do. I just want control of my life! Stop controlling or try to control my life! I'm sick of it! I hate it when i have to take into consideration of your feelings! That i've neglected my family and do things to compensate it. And when i do that, they expect more. WTH! I wanna work, I wanna play, I wanna have time with my friends. And it's not one or a few. I've got different cliques. I'm growing up.. i have my interests.. I have my desired life.. Stop obstructing my way. SUCKS!

9:24 PM;
I Lost My Way ToYOU